Ifemelu, a Nigerian woman who lives in Princeton, New Jersey, gets her hair braided in preparation for her upcoming return to Nigeria. She has broken up with her boyfriend, Blaine, closed her popular blog about race, and uprooted her life because she feels weighed down. When she thinks of returning to Nigeria, she can’t help but think of Obinze, her first love, now a wealthy man in Lagos with a wife and daughter. Upon receiving an email from Ifemelu, Obinze becomes distracted. He has stumbled into wealth after his cousin introduces him to a well-connected man. His wife, Kosi, is beautiful and adoring, but they never connected on the emotional level that he and Ifemelu did. That night, he listens to the music he and Ifemelu used to listen to when they made love.
The novel flashes back to Ifemelu’s youth. She and Obinze meet at a party where a friend attempts to set Obinze up with a girl named Ginika. Obinze has admired Ifemelu from afar since transferring to their school, and they immediately hit it off. They date all throughout secondary school and through the start of university. However, university lecturer strikes keep closing the universities, and Obinze and Aunty Uju encourage Ifemelu to apply to school in America. Ifemelu is accepted and then quickly approved for a student visa. Ifemelu and Obinze plan to one day reunite in America. Unfortunately, Ifemelu’s student visa does not allow her to work, and without a full scholarship and stipend, Ifemelu must find a source of income. She applies to jobs using a family friend’s social security card to no avail. In desperation, she agrees to work for a shady tennis coach as his “relaxation assistant,” which involves allowing him to touch her sexually. After one meeting, she never returns to the coach. Out of shame and self-loathing, she stops replying to Obinze’s messages and emails.
Ifemelu’s luck changes when Ginika introduces her to Kimberly, a white woman who needs a babysitter. The steady work offers her a chance to focus on her studies. She meets Kimberly’s wealthy cousin, Curt, who is immediately smitten with her. They start dating, and when Ifemelu graduates, Curt helps her get a job that will sponsor her green card. For the job interview, Ifemelu needs to have her hair relaxed so that it will look professional according to American standards. The relaxer burns her scalp, and her friend Wambui encourages her to try wearing her hair natural. At first, Ifemelu thinks her hair is ugly, but soon grows to love it. One day, she runs into a friend from Nigeria, who asks what happened between her and Obinze. She gives him the cold shoulder, and is upset the rest of the day. Although she explains that the university friend was not an ex-boyfriend, Curt acts possessive.
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